Gooble Gobble, Gooble Gobble, One Of Us

[Gone in 60]

Well, curse you all. And Ebay.

I had ridden for several blissful years having never heard of RLETs. Then, I buy this bike in April, and suddenly I'm less of a man for not having them. I wrestled with it for months, watching you all make your welcome comments to the new owners, saying "Nice bike, now put some RLETs on it!"

I had tagged a set on Ebay, but they came and went. Read you all commenting more about RLETs a few days ago, and my phone buzzed. The Ebay app said "An item you were interested in was just relisted!"

Well, shoot. They would almost make sense on the Bonneville. It's a tight squeeze between my wife's right taillight and my garage door spring to wedge it into its parking space. I pulled the trigger on four of them to cover both bikes.

They arrived yesterday. When I got home from work, my wife was doing some medical charting at the dining room table. "I'll be done in ten minutes, then let's go for a walk."

I said no problem, I'd check the mail, then I'd have a five minute project in the garage, so I'd be done and ready for our walk at the same time.

Opening one of the packages, and holding it next to the brake lever, I thought "How in the world is this thing supposed to go on?" I lubed up the inside of the rubber bit and the ball on the brake lever with some slippery rubber preservative, and started shoving. For the next fifteen minutes.

Shove-plink-go fish it out from under my car.
Shove-plink-go fish it out from under my wife's car.

Keep in mind, that the CB is parked behind my car, so whatever I'm doing is well within "hey neighbor, whatcha doing to your bike?" conversation range. And, it was prime "just got home from work, let's walk the dog" time. So first neighbor asked. Second neighbor asked, and added "So, which bike do you like better?" To which I muttered under my breath "Hell, I dunno, which one of those chihuahuas do you like better, because they both bark too loud." I was becoming aggravated at my lack of progress and the interruptions.

In my fervor, I missed seeing Sonal, my wife's favorite neighbor, walk by with her dogs. She was obviously concerned about my gesticulations with the small bits of rubber, and must have texted my wife, because she came down to the garage a few minutes later and said "Let's go for a walk around the lake. Whatever you are doing, you're scaring the neighbors."

Fine. This is one of those "come back later when your head is clear" projects.

After dinner, I boiled a mug of water, and dropped the four RLETs into it to soften them up. Then, I grabbed a rag to get some grip, and started shoving again. POP! On it went. Other side... POP, on it went. Success!

On to the Bonneville, which has a larger ball at the end of the levers. No worry. I'm good at this now. POP, POP, on they went.

I went back upstairs, and celebrated my manhood by binge watching John Wayne WW2 movies. I fell asleep sometime around when Kirk Douglas gets blown up in the B25 in "In Harm's Way."

I did not drain or wash the mug I used to boil the RLETs. No. I made my coffee in that water this morning. It tasted like he**, but I figured it was the closest thing to drinking the blood of a horrible beast that I had just slain.

[pdedse]

My recipe...dab of olive oil...15 seconds microwave...5 second install.

But I do like your coffee recipe!

[the Ferret]

and another angel gets their wings

[GoldOxide_imp]

lol. I used pure, raw and brute manhood. 15 seconds for the left, less than 3 minutes for the right.

[Lord Popgun]

Do, or do not. There is no try. And succeed did you. One of us now you are. (as usual, read in Yoda's voice)

[peterbaron]

Proud Padawan still I am...spent no time on installation at all

[Lord Popgun]

My own Grand Chancellor. I just can't believe it.

You're missing out on the 5-10HP increase, gas mileage you can't believe and tire wear that is almost nonexistent.

[Cobalt23_imp]

I tried brute strength, spit, boiling water . . . then my wife popped them on in about 2 mins! Lucky in love I guess!

[pekingduck]

My God! Have you no shame? No dignity?

RLETs on a Bonneville?

God save the Queen! And Boorish Johnson!

[peterbaron]

Proud Padawan still I am...spent no time on installation at all

My own Grand Chancellor. I just can't believe it.

You're missing out on the 5-10HP increase, gas mileage you can't believe and tire wear that is almost nonexistent.

Sorry My Lord, but strictly for health and safety reasons, that extra 5-10 HP would definitely result this ....during CB acceleration::