07-08-2019, 10:20 PM
Guy on the FJR forum posted this in a thread by someone wanting to get louder mufflers for his bike...made me laugh:
I want my exhaust as LOUD as I can get it. This accomplishes several things for me.
1. It lets my neighbors know who the Alpha Male is in our neighborhood. Nothing screams "Screw you I am more important than you are" at 3am quite like revving up my engine before work.
2. Loud Pipes Save Lives. I have saved so many lives that my hometown has staged parades for me. I am a local hero. The entire fire department, the local EMTs and the hospital staff combined have not saved as many lives as I have with my Loud Pipes. Little old ladies approach me in the grocery store to thank me for Saving them with my Loud Pipes. But I just ignore them. I am far too cool for such things with my loud pipes.
3. The Dyno has clearly shown that I can gain 0.000406 horsepower. That's a lot when you consider that my FJR only puts down about 125 at the rear tire.
4. Now I fit in with the Harley Riders. Before my Loud Pipes the HD guys would not let me ride with them. I felt like Rudolph with his red nose. They would not let me play any Reindeer Games. But now I am One of Them. We make it a point to rev our engines at gas stations, bar room parking lots and when we ride in front of nursing homes. We especially LOVE to rev the engine when we are backing into a parking spot. It makes folks think we have Reverse.
5. My loud pipes are a lot lighter than the quiet pipes. I lost 5 pounds per muffler. That weight is really low so a normal rider can't really feel it but since I am so awesome I can ride much faster than I could before. 10 pounds of weight loss from a bike that weighs 640 plus unloaded is huge! I could have gone on a diet, maybe done some exercise and lost more than 10 pounds myself but then my black leather vest with the patches wouldn't fit right anymore.
***Disclaimer*** The above monologue was Sarcasm. No one should feel insulted, slighted, offended or angry as a result of reading that sarcasm. That sarcasm was intended for entertainment purposes only. This sarcasm should not be quoted as fact nor should it be used as the basis for any decisions on the part of the reader. No animals were harmed during the typing of the sarcasm. The sarcasm does not necessarily reflect the views of this forum.
I want my exhaust as LOUD as I can get it. This accomplishes several things for me.
1. It lets my neighbors know who the Alpha Male is in our neighborhood. Nothing screams "Screw you I am more important than you are" at 3am quite like revving up my engine before work.
2. Loud Pipes Save Lives. I have saved so many lives that my hometown has staged parades for me. I am a local hero. The entire fire department, the local EMTs and the hospital staff combined have not saved as many lives as I have with my Loud Pipes. Little old ladies approach me in the grocery store to thank me for Saving them with my Loud Pipes. But I just ignore them. I am far too cool for such things with my loud pipes.
3. The Dyno has clearly shown that I can gain 0.000406 horsepower. That's a lot when you consider that my FJR only puts down about 125 at the rear tire.
4. Now I fit in with the Harley Riders. Before my Loud Pipes the HD guys would not let me ride with them. I felt like Rudolph with his red nose. They would not let me play any Reindeer Games. But now I am One of Them. We make it a point to rev our engines at gas stations, bar room parking lots and when we ride in front of nursing homes. We especially LOVE to rev the engine when we are backing into a parking spot. It makes folks think we have Reverse.
5. My loud pipes are a lot lighter than the quiet pipes. I lost 5 pounds per muffler. That weight is really low so a normal rider can't really feel it but since I am so awesome I can ride much faster than I could before. 10 pounds of weight loss from a bike that weighs 640 plus unloaded is huge! I could have gone on a diet, maybe done some exercise and lost more than 10 pounds myself but then my black leather vest with the patches wouldn't fit right anymore.
***Disclaimer*** The above monologue was Sarcasm. No one should feel insulted, slighted, offended or angry as a result of reading that sarcasm. That sarcasm was intended for entertainment purposes only. This sarcasm should not be quoted as fact nor should it be used as the basis for any decisions on the part of the reader. No animals were harmed during the typing of the sarcasm. The sarcasm does not necessarily reflect the views of this forum.
![[Image: 7185f6c35d3d8b8029446c36c8b7398c.gif]](https://cb1100forum.net/forum/uploads/imp/201907/7185f6c35d3d8b8029446c36c8b7398c.gif)
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